Sad face.
Guess we'll be moving on the final round of clomid. Very bittersweet. Sweet in the fact that I'm so tired of taking clomid. Bitter in the fact that this is it. I have no idea what lies ahead if we don't get pregnant this last round. Since my insurance doesn't provide much in this way, I'm not sure what our next course of action will be. I would imagine most people would move on to a specialist but I'm not sure if my insurance would even cover THAT.
The last few rounds I haven't been this upset when it didn't work out. I'm now slowly coming to the realization that I may never be able to have children and that my friends, is a real eye-0pener. I've always said I'm open to adoption but that is way beyond our means at this point as well. I'm so sick of all these fertility books saying that if you want children, you will be able to have them, even if you have to take a different route to have them. Well what those books don't take into account are people like me and Justin who don't make a butt-load of cash and don't have great insurance to cover other treatments.
I'm hoping to set an appointment up with my OBGYN so we can discuss future treatments, if any. I'll let you know how that goes.
I'm at work now which means I have to shut the emotion off and turn on my professional face. I'm hoping for a quiet, non-stressful, busy day. I definitely need it.
Hey Steph, I don't really know what to say other than that I'm reading, listening, and praying for you. If you ever need someone to chat with in person - I'm totally up for it. I know from experience that husbands aren't always the best at "girl talk".
ReplyDeleteHere's to a great rest of your Monday.
Apparently, your blog is anti-long comment. So, here's a few nice Monday tidbits for you.
ReplyDeleteEven if you feel like this grumpy calf: http://www.flickr.com/photos/pioneerwoman/4069710595/, I hope this gives you a good laugh. http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/2008/09/going-to-dogs.html Best. blog. eva.
Oh Lindsay you're awesome! I was having a really hard day yesterday and I'm doing a lot better today. We're hoping this last round of Clomid goes well and if not then we'll find out in a couple weeks what our options are. Justin and I talked about it and we're young so if we have to take a couple years "off" to put some money away for treatment, then that's fine. My body is not completely incapable of having babies without the help of drugs, just doesn't work on a schedule so not all hope is lost.
ReplyDeleteI also need to remind myself that just because so many of my friends have had or are having babies, doesn't mean I need to keep up. I'm only 25 so hopefully there is plenty of time left.
Hey Steph,
ReplyDeleteI don't know if you remember me from band but I'm Kimberly (Jenkins), Lindsay's sister. I just wanted to let you know that my husband and I are going through almost exactly the same thing you are. Reading your blog was like reading an acoount of the last 18 months for me. If you ever need someone to listen who knows how you feel, just email me. Kimberlyfaul@gmail.com If you need any advice about REproductive Endocrinoligists I am seeing one, and I've done TONS of research about adoption (I think we're almost to point where that's our option) and there are lots of financial things I could let you know about concerning that. Just know that I'm praying for you in the meantime.
Kimberly