The infertility stuff is temporarily being put on hold due to kidney stones again! I have to have a procedure for my kidney stones next week and some follow up appointments for them so getting the HSG is the low on the totem pole right now. I have enough going on with my lady business lately that I don't even want to think about more abdominal x-rays! My other blog explains more.
http://weezmachine.livejournal.com
Friday, March 26, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Brown Paper Bag
I don't know if it's because spring is almost here and spring is my favorite season but I feel like something switched over in my brain. Like I feel more optimistic about everything all of a sudden. Maybe it's also because I ran into a friend of mine who just had a baby in January, we chatted, then she told me she had two miscarriages and a long bout of trying and not getting pregnant beforehand. I never knew any of that. So I feel like I can do this. I'm kind of relieved to be taking some time off from medication. I was so scared of getting the HSG (hysterosalpingogram) just yesterday and now today I feel like I can do it, no big deal. That's me though, I feel strong one day and scared the next.
We're kind of waiting for our tax return before getting either of the tests done but I think I might have Justin go ahead and do his whenever. It IS pretty convenient for him after all and the inconspicuous brown paper bag with a spooge cup inside has been sitting on our kitchen counter for a few weeks. My test, on the other hand, will have to wait until we get some extra dough, which is fine.
There will still be bad days where all I wanna do is sulk about how crappy my situation is but today I felt really positive about where things COULD go.
We're kind of waiting for our tax return before getting either of the tests done but I think I might have Justin go ahead and do his whenever. It IS pretty convenient for him after all and the inconspicuous brown paper bag with a spooge cup inside has been sitting on our kitchen counter for a few weeks. My test, on the other hand, will have to wait until we get some extra dough, which is fine.
There will still be bad days where all I wanna do is sulk about how crappy my situation is but today I felt really positive about where things COULD go.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Phase One: complete
Round 6: no go. It was so crazy too because I didn't get cramps or anything like I normally do and I had a bit of spotting beforehand (which never happens). So of course I go out and buy a pregnancy test to take the next day. But the next day, it came, full force. So that was awesome.
Now I feel a little like a lost puppy. Justin and I will go through the next set of testing (semen analysis and hysterosalpingogram) and use some of our tax return to pay for it. Not exactly what I wanted to use any of that money for but you'll have that. I don't know when I'll schedule it. Justin can go in anytime. He has it easy. Jerk off in a cup. Seriously. I, on the other hand, had a nightmare a few nights ago about the hysterosalpingogram. I've been assured that it's really not that bad and it's similar to a pap-smear but I'm still a little bit scared. Why can't they just put me under and do it? (haha). I'm thinking within the next month or two I'll go in for that. If there are any abnormalities discovered from either of the tests, then we'll figure out what we need to do. If both tests are normal, then I think it's back on drugs and possibly IUI. We may take some time off from all the madness before we move on to that anyway.
One thing I promised myself was that if the last round of Clomid didn't result in pregnancy, I would put my excess energy into other outlets for a while. I have a volunteer app for the Cedar Rapids Animal Shelter that I've been delaying sending it so I'm going to mail that on Monday. I'm also going to focus on losing weight. I am not at a healthy weight right now so now that the weather is getting nicer and I can be outside a lot more, I'm really going to try this time. I'm not sure if that will help with anything but it's something that I need to do.
I've had to work for a lot of what I have so why should having babies be any different I suppose?
Now I feel a little like a lost puppy. Justin and I will go through the next set of testing (semen analysis and hysterosalpingogram) and use some of our tax return to pay for it. Not exactly what I wanted to use any of that money for but you'll have that. I don't know when I'll schedule it. Justin can go in anytime. He has it easy. Jerk off in a cup. Seriously. I, on the other hand, had a nightmare a few nights ago about the hysterosalpingogram. I've been assured that it's really not that bad and it's similar to a pap-smear but I'm still a little bit scared. Why can't they just put me under and do it? (haha). I'm thinking within the next month or two I'll go in for that. If there are any abnormalities discovered from either of the tests, then we'll figure out what we need to do. If both tests are normal, then I think it's back on drugs and possibly IUI. We may take some time off from all the madness before we move on to that anyway.
One thing I promised myself was that if the last round of Clomid didn't result in pregnancy, I would put my excess energy into other outlets for a while. I have a volunteer app for the Cedar Rapids Animal Shelter that I've been delaying sending it so I'm going to mail that on Monday. I'm also going to focus on losing weight. I am not at a healthy weight right now so now that the weather is getting nicer and I can be outside a lot more, I'm really going to try this time. I'm not sure if that will help with anything but it's something that I need to do.
I've had to work for a lot of what I have so why should having babies be any different I suppose?
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